I closed this summer with another sampling party and salon in my home. Only this time, I served Gin and Chronics to my guests along with marijuana cheese and crackers (Hoocheese), pumpKIND tarts, and of course the infamous gingersnap with extra snap. When hosting a weed tasting party I must be an alchemist crafting perfect highs for the masses. This means I don’t want to disappoint anyone and I also don’t want them sleeping over. Sometimes I include a small amount of magic mushrooms to keep everyone alert, but not this time.

This time, I wanted to showcase some products that don’t generally get served at desert. Marijuana should be ingested before a big meal as things will be answered in priority sequence. By serving a cheese ball and cocktail you and your guests can get your high on earlier in the night and not wake up stoned. However, if you do want to get stoned for breakfast, call me, I have a great Budscotti. All this and a stripper from Sweet Soul Burlesque, Pete Johansson doing comedy, DJ Girl Cherise and Slow Poke and the Smoke singing Doo Wop Pop! It was a party not to remember!

Earlier in the summer I went to Shambhala, BC’s version of Burning Man. Whenever I am asked how it was I think “Man it was great, but all I can remember was the extortion.”Imagine, four guys dressed in black approaching me and my boyfriend, handcuffing us and demanding to search the vehicle after the festival had ended. I was eating corn on the cob and Gary had a Q tip in his ear, we were waiting for a tow doll to pull my defunct van off the property. The hired thugs/security made it seem as if they were working for the RCM P but they weren’t. After finding nothing substantial in the van but money they decided they would like to take some of it. They demanded I forge some vendor documents, took four grand and then offered me a sweet receipt. When I got back Gary still had the Q tip in his ear and we were released. Long story short, I played a few aces when I returned to the city and finally two guys came to my door with apologies and four thousand dollars in cash. The moral of this story is, “The only time you should be in handcuffs is during consensual sex.” (This story is in more detail on my web site).

Another highlight for me was Moses Znaimers’ IDEA City held in Toronto, June 21st. It features 50 speakers from all over the world discussing everything from cryogenics to torture victims in Saudi Arabia. This event attracts the cream of the crop in entrepreneurs on all sides of the spectrum. It’s like jumping jacks for the brain. I was not only miraculously invited to attend; I was also rather well received by what many would consider conservative people with lots of dough. I only bring this up because one week earlier I was kicked out of an East Side Pride event. What’s happening in the world when the gay community finds me too extreme and the business community finds me charming?

Ah! Summer on Wreck Beach! What can I say? I can never decide ‘what not to wear.’ I religiously sold watermelon and cookies to my nude disciples whilst basking in the warm glow of the sun every day. I coffee break in the ocean, or groove to some live music just the next log over. Life is sweet on Wreck Beach. I can’t wait to get to work every day because I can’t wait to get naked. Don’t forget to come join us for FREE WATERMELON DAY next year. I give away over five hundred pounds of free watermelon. It is a glorious day coupled with our BARE BUNS RUN, the only nude marathon held in Canadian public soil.

Life is what you make it these days, and I've got to say I am pretty happy being unapologetic about who I am. I’m Watermelon. Comic! Baker! Entrepreneur! Woman! Drug dealer Extraordinaire!

Watermelon